Snowflake kisses,

like cotton candy clouds,

linger in an air of silence,

where eyes closed like windows,

shut to an open diary,

of strawberry memories,

and chocolate longings.

I lay here in bed today thinking about yesterday, the day before, the week ago, and the month long past where you were no longer at my side. With great effort, the tears do not fall, only faint tired smiles as the sweeter memories waft back like the aroma of cookies in my still empty room. I hugged your old college jacket you left here for me, trying to capture what presence of you that remains. Did I not love you enough? Did I really love my work more than I did you? I think not. At journey's end, all that remain is a dusty shelf of old poetry, and cartons of writing from long dead poets, and at best a degree testifying to this long journey. What else could I take from this long walk? I wish I could take you, for the long journey that is life thereafter. I can hear the gentle hum of muffled thunder beyond my window, sister sky calls for me. I put on your ghostly shell, grabbing the clear umbrella that had sheltered us before and ran mindless out of my house, to the spot that you said you would be waiting. Slamming the gate shut before me, I ran barefoot towards the lift, zooming past my startled neighbor. It doesn’t matter, I did not care, I needed the first drops of rain to clear my eyes, to cleanse my soul. Too late, the rain had already begun to fall, their gentle patter greeting me softly on the clear umbrella as I ran up the stairs to our garden. Pools of water have already begun to form and I was breathless in the stirring storm. I stopped at the brink, where the sky met with Eden, the horizon glazed with sheeted rain. I inhaled deeply, tossing the umbrella aside, letting the rain envelope me with the little you that remains. The cold embrace like death gripped my heart, as the sheer pajamas did little to warm me. It was not only the cold, but your sheer absence; a greater iciness that followed that forced me to my knees. The water fell oblivious to my presence, as the rain form like rivers, descending and cascading down the stairs like memories slipping by, like the past washing from me like dirt off a knelling statue. Did I cry? I probably did, but no one would know. All they could see from their homes above as a crumpled blue figure, a silly girl barefoot in her sleep wear wearing a mismatched jacket. I felt like an abandoned pet, left behind to fade away in this cold cruel world.